Could Voodoo Soap be the Answer?

When I was a kid I used to collect coins.  Actually, that’s not true. My dad used to bring home foreign coins and foist them on me. I learned a lot from those coins from places such as San Marino, Finland and Mexico. Most of all I learned that collecting them isn’t a great hobby.

Ever since then I have been kind of hobby free. Oh sure, I flirted with gardening and had a brief interest in painting but nothing has ever filled that gaping void caused in my life when I gave those coins to my unfortunate nephew. Let’s see if I can find something suitable.

I could buy soap making supplies and make soap. It would be great fun and you probably don’t even need to wash your hands for a week after you make a few bars. The only problem is that it doesn’t really grab me. I am a big fan of soap and all, but making it as a hobby just doesn’t sound like my kind of thing. I guess I could amuse myself by making rude soap but, no, it just won’t do.

Or, I could buy some  lab equipment and start carrying out some experiments with bubbling beakers and burning Bunsen, err, burners. At this point I could tell you how I blew up the science wing of my school building but you would know that it was a lie. I did once drop a test tube though. It didn’t break.

Alternatively, I could get a tennis court construction sorted out in my back garden. The only problem is that my back garden is only big enough for half a tennis court. Not to worry though, my in laws live a couple of doors down (handy, eh?) and they could have the other half in their garden. This way I could invent Long Distance Tennis, just as I previously invented Golf Basketball, Downhill Football and Blindfold Backwards Ten Pin Bowling.

I’ve saved the best till last in a way which can only be described as sneaky. Where I live there is stil la lot of belief and faith put in healers and shamen. I could take up voodoo and start giving out and curing curses. It seems that the going rate for curing people is a live chicken – this is true, I just checked – so I think that before long I will be up to my ears in eggs as well as having a great hobby.